Taking the Self Out

Thoughts on the World, and Corona-virus
Co-authored conversation by Endre Voros and Roy Hodges, April 3, 2020

Taking the self out, more beneficial, maybe even especially right now. Not a burden, though it may seem like it. Of course, it’s a lot of work to do this, and requires, no, requests much courage. It may seem like a waste of time, though only in preference to maintaining habits and doing things, pursuing things, reaching for things that provide either pleasures or put away pains. This taking out, it’s like a daemon process, always running, in the background. It’s a subtle work, though it took great work to train. It’s not something one may just buy off the shelf for ninety-nine cents, though those discount clearance books may point to it. It will take great work, and then, perhaps, when the moment is ri<pe|ght>, then there are two possibilities that are potentially pregnant, like a fruit. Either a seed, with the pith, and skin to contain both, fall upon the earth, or, the queen wasp’s children seek quick exit, to allow the young queens to escape, to continue the herd’s survival. Either way, a tree is born, a tree of life. It is very interesting… this work.

And there is this desire to find some footing, maybe at the same time. To re-port, to come back to some grounding, a sense of home. Ultimately this is un-needed, but it is okay, if it is needed for now.

What is one to do when self-view dissipates and it is seen that what remains is not necessarily attached to samsara anymore? To nature’s many weavings?

After this? And after this? And after this? Tree roots, tree leaves, and trunk. Surviving on bare necessities, beyond simple, and complex living. Living. Sharing. Love. Compassion. Insight. These work together, not self, not other, just these. It’s quite silly and absurd actually.

The “world” is let go of, there is renunciation, yet Beauty or a feeling much deeper remains.

Beautiful mentality, beautiful feeling. The entire tree is quite <beautiful|empty>. This is seen directly. The arising of movement becomes activity-less. It’s very easy to slip into activity, here. And it is possible to remain, allow movement to move without identification bouncing back while moving with it and then it is as if a wave appears moving through and out and back, the body can feel this subtle alive vibration.

Even this Beauty is empty and beautiful!

When just a notch back from direct perception, just a sliver of light, it’s almost as if from either perspective, the ox is relieved, greatly relieved, “oh thank god that sage is off my back,” and the sage is greatly relieved, “oh dear, it finally is happy.” It’s quite absurd, as stated above, and even this awareness, this wisdom, dissolves into emptiness. Yeah, and then right here, those ox-herding pictures, silly. Happiness remains, and then there is this phenomena of coming off the mountain into the world, though the world arrives, without moving, it just continues to arrive, as fruits of intentions passed, seen directly. The lineage changes from worldly to knowing cause and effect of mentality, knowing that this phenomena, seeing this argumentation in the market, echoes of distance, passed, it really is. How did I arrive into a world of witnessing this arguing over the price of a pear? This is answered immediately, it’s jarring at first, though now seems clearly evident. Kamma.

The direct path opens so directly that within each thing is all other things and I am not here although there is awareness within and around and through all forms and impermanence.

Now, the steps, the footing, are these very direct perceptions. This is the footing, this becomes the ground, joy, directly seeing joy, beyond self, beyond others, seeing any joy. Maybe the joy of even a little ant, or a bird, or a deer playing in the park. Just joy. This becomes a ground for further progress…

And without even trying the sage can emit this joy back into samsara itself, even without self this is done.

Yes, this is what happens when “standing” on the ground of joy. It’s going to move, all of it, and beyond uniform and non-uniform. It’s going to be shifting, continually, it’s quite beautiful. Yet, here, when the self sneaks back in, or when delusion does, even the slightest bit, it will drop out below joy, so even here, a little bit of wishing for more can happen.

Some who are more sensitive will feel it and be moved to take part, in some way.

The “cause” of joy is that this all existed a priori and it also can be replanted back into the psyche of unsuspecting people.

Yes, that’s called “inserting entire worlds” into the “world pores” without others knowing. And it makes sense, post insight, because “other” is other-view, and implies self-view. It’s just a phenomena of generosity. Generosity is seen directly, the wave traverses all beings, it is unobstructed by “this is mine”, “i don’t have enough”, “i need better toilet paper”, much of that is burned off at this stage.

Right, Knowing this creates this. No need for anything else


Yes. Light emission, metabolism is the phenomena here. All the mitochondria, chlorophyll, all this activity of heat and light exchange, fires. All these little fires, all over. Mentality, neural transmission, ion exchange, the whole ball of this. Even water flowing down a river, carries heat off the glacier so too, down below. Water evaporates, carries heat off the earth, and now clouds start forming.

In stillness, the impressions of movement carry upward and outward, and those impressions are latent in the patterns of the droplets arranged in the clouds, in the atmosphere’s subte or gross passing.

And sometimes it’s words, or business being done, or traffic flowing or thinking, it is possible to see it carried here also but no attachment to even these forms – just words, just business, still beautiful and impermanent and kamma and… ok.

So now the silence has two legs, it gets up, it moves across the room for something as common as coffee, tea, or lunch. It goes and gets the mail, here the obstacles come. Grumble the belly goes, solving with some provisions. Maybe open the mailbox, and realize, “yes, life is like continually opening this mailbox”. And then reaching in, “yes, perception is reaching,” and then touching paper, “yes, this mind is touching, yes, like this,” all experience joins the work of insight and awareness. Even the most common, or the most extreme experiences, like this urgent news about coronavirus, the sun’s corona, this vast shell of heat and light emitting, this virus of light, impressing and generating energy which moves the great many things and is the source of the energy of life, it’s very interesting, right down to the many armed Shiva and Shakti, like that virus.

And in all these trips to the mailbox, or the store, or work, there is a saturation until the atmosphere itself is changed and saturated with this light and this awareness. Then, it’s like a virus, anyone can be touched by it.

So all taken onto the path of activitylessness, all this, is burned into the light of wisdom. All of the activity burning, and the ground below it is still, to allow that burning to take place of its own without interference. The ground isn’t shaking up the fire, the ground is pure joy, happiness with experiencing what is directly. The smoke rises cleanly, without interference of panic, worry, distress, or over-exuberance.

Holy fuck, is this what Jesus meant that the dead shall be raised from the earth?

This activity overcomes all difficulty, even death.

Because it has all been done and all “people” have and will become enlightened.

Ignorance is abolished, and to know that this ignorance and wisdom is only an effluence of this beautiful phenomena of this living organism, evolved, emergent, this gift of perception, however deluded or wise, it’s this activity of cleansing perception, allowing perception to see directly, see phenomena directly, allowing all beings the time and space to see phenomena directly, allowing all beings the time and space through either good health, good environments, good family, good support. Like scientists, like those who re-read, sitting against a tree, and realizing directly; this is the best gift to give.

And these insights “disappear” because self view returns?

Yes, here is where even that tiny sliver of “one” tiny grain of sand can send the whole hillside back down below joy, like sand in the eye, stopping the entire world to get it out.

So then even this can be seen and joy “returns”?

So the grip gets really strong, and by grip, it’s these “paws”, these “hands” of perception. To climb back up, to stand back up, when in reality, it is actually this activity of stabilizing perception. It is directly proportional to this “grip”-ability.

Monkey paw in pitch?

Yes. and that’s where it’s seen directly, this moment. Aware of that gripping to stabilize, so that phenomena can be seen. This want to see it directly, this need to solve samsara, this want to stop the wheel of death and rebirth, this need. This is seen directly now, and now even that can be directly perceived.

Gripping was the original sin?

This is where things really “speed” up, it will be like leaning out on a ledge, looking into the great abyss. This is where all words, all the effluence burns up. Self-view appears to be seen even here.

Grip, not-grip, grip, not-grip. Over and over, a great sea. And now the necessity of this gripping to still, for benefit is seen directly too. So the monkey just gives in, it’s going to die, it’s caught, the catcher comes to sell its flesh. Here it comes, there he is with the rope, there’s the cage, there’s the cart. Here it is, death is not only near, it is here. No escape. The heart, the ox, excited, heat increasing, effluence smoking, sky filling with worries. And seeing directly, it clears. Metabolism at work in all forms. Monkey catcher feeding family, escaping the pith of the city, wanting to move to the country, for his family. The whole sea of suffering, wanting, and craving. And how did I arrive here to see this catcher coming? How was this seen? Oh yes… oh yes… this is where knowledge can rarely go.

And now, the monkey sits. Right in the pitch. Calm, upright, ardent. Just sitting. Here’s the fly in the fly trap, here’s the rat in the poison bait. Here’s the human at rock bottom, in the pit. And here now, self view, as a result of all the work done prior, all the stilling, all the work to polish that grip, all the work to stand still, to pull in, to withdraw, to renounce, generates an ability to experience immobility. The catcher comes, and is so dumbfounded by this monkey sitting calmly. It’s quite a contrast. No expectation of what comes next, no fear. All experience this little monkey takes onto the path. The ox is ready, because the ox and monkey have gone beyond self-view. Immobility. Here is where no more falling back happens. The monkey can’t fall backward anymore, because self-view is eradicated. What falls back? Right here, right now. Chop wood, carry water. See see, touch touch, taste taste, hear hear, smell smell.

And then even the copying is seen, the urge to move towards copy.

Excellent wisdom this is called. 😉

And now the rain falls, all that heat, all that stilling, all that pulling together that made a great “funeral pyre”, opened the clouds above. The water vapor condenses, and falls, and helps all beings. Why? Precious crops rely on this water, and by precious crops, it means civilization. People. Beings.

No-Self is the creator for All – creation occurs towards what is needed through no self.